Learning how to set boundaries is more often than not a lesson we typically don’t forget. Setting boundaries keeps us in our essence and maintains our light; however, when we don’t set clear boundaries we end up losing our essence and in some situations our health and vitality. The goal: create boundaries while staying open.
Creating boundaries allows you to stay open to those experiences, people, relationships, and opportunities that will support your transformation and evolution, and will be supportive and nourishing for you. This leads to healthier relationships and experiences.
I learned boundaries the hard way. Throughout my life, I was frequently in situations that were less than healthy and unsupportive. And, when I was a teacher, I constantly felt like my boundaries were being broken down and tested. I didn’t learn how to set healthy boundaries. Just as an example, my mother used to call me 7-8 times a day and it took me finally saying that you can’t do that anymore for it to stop, and now we are at once per day. The one way that you learn to set boundaries is by not setting them at all. Really, when we don’t do this we end up wishing we had or wishing we had done something differently.
This extends to our partnerships and intimate relationships where we are vulnerable and open. We have to maintain healthy boundaries in our relationships by establishing what is acceptable and what is not. It doesn’t mean we close ourselves off, it simply means we are being compassionate to ourselves.
I feel like we are all learning this lesson lately in many ways. It is up to us to step into our power and essence, and create healthy boundaries.
Boundaries in a Nutshell
- You are not a bad or mean person because you have established clear boundaries. “No” is good.
- Do it sooner than later. We all get into situations that we wish we hadn’t gotten involved with or we realize that it’s just not going to work for us. Set the guidelines before you are backpedaling.
- Get clear, what are your boundaries? Do you need to establish clearer boundaries? Are you afraid you may hurt someone?
- Be compassionate with yourself first.
- Sometimes we are so open that we don’t even realize that we are not energetically protecting our essence. Take time to sit and see where you maybe giving too much of yourself to others.
- Speak it. Use your voice, and speak your truth. If you don’t tell someone that they have crossed a line, they will never know and keep doing what they are doing.
- Attract those people and experiences into your life that are supportive by setting healthy boundaries. Healthy boundaries=being open to receiving the good stuff like love, respect, nourishment, and support.