Radical Acceptance


Through radical acceptance of another, we come to radical acceptance of ourselves and our lives. This is not so simple. It is at times difficult and gut-wrenching to accept something we foresee as “un” acceptable, painful, inappropriate, hurtful, dishonorable, or we can’t seem to accept those idiosyncratic behaviors of our loved ones; yet, can we forgive the unacceptable and move into acceptance? Today, this lesson was spinning wind, it was all over the place.

Some of what I experienced today was a heavy achy heart. A heart that couldn’t accept a child suffering in such a way, a teacher that couldn’t accept herself for not doing enough and not being able to, feeling deep anger, and frustration at a system that is broken. Then, realizing all the ways that in relationship, one radically accepts the other person, and experiences unconditional love. Ultimately, we accept ourselves more profoundly, when we are accepted by another and loved unconditionally. It is much easier to come to radical acceptance when we start with love; however,  it is much more difficult and almost impossible when we come from anger, hurt, pain, or a wounded experience.  Start with love and radically accept the “we-ness.”   (Dedicated to my students for teaching me radical acceptance-daily. A note from one of my students.)

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